BIG POTATO ONLINE

Cynical about life, serious about vegetables.

PL

Absurd

  • Let’s be honest, we’ve all thought about it. What would we actually do if the world ended? The zombie apocalypse! The first, most crucial rule to remember is this – it only takes one bite to kill you. Let me repeat that. One bite! So, when you’re faced with more than one zombie – run.…

  • And so I fell down another internet rabbit hole. You know how it is. It started with digging through archives of American comics and current affairs magazines from the 1950s and 1960s. At one point, I was hooked by an ad on the back page of one of the magazines. It promised true wonders for…

  • Clothes just don’t stop needing to be washed — because no, you can’t live in that one t-shirt for the rest of your life. Trust me. I’ve tried. It doesn’t work.

  • This morning, at work, a tiny reed warbler hit the window next to me. A soft thud. There he was, a small, dazed bundle of feathers on the ground.

  • When I think about my cultural heritage, I don’t imagine a dusty museum with glass cabinets and “do not touch” signs. For me, it’s more like a living, breathing story that keeps unfolding — sometimes I follow the old script, and sometimes I rewrite it completely.

  • As someone wiser than me probably once said — we all love stories where someone ends up looking like a fool. And who am I to deny us all that pleasure?

  • Ah, energy. That mystical force that allows normal people to somehow survive another day. For me, it’s less about energy drinks and more about a carefully curated selection of existential dread and lack of horticultural experience.

  • On vacation my daughter bought herself a plush Labubu. A shaggy little creature with huge ears, saucer eyes, and a grin straight out of a dentist’s nightmare. And that’s when I remembered: for more than a hundred years, every once in a while, the toy world has produced a devilish hit – a plushie, a…

  • Recently, I was browsing the internet and stumbled upon a familiar word: Stargate. What could Stargate be? For me, it’s one of my favorite TV shows from my youth! The iconic spinning gate through which the phenomenal SG-1 team travelled to other worlds! A bit of mythology, a bit of action, a bit of sci-fi…

  • Lately, I’ve been wondering what I’ll be writing about on the blog in the future. Of course, the main theme will always be my natural vegetable garden! I’m learning how to pretend that everything happening there was part of the plan all along. I’ll probably also add a few posts about my unconfirmed tricks for…

  • Welcome to the New Year 2025 according to the Gregorian calendar! Many of you probably never wondered where this date actually comes from, but here I am with the answer — if only so I’ve got some content for the blog!

  • Namaste! Good day, my friends, and other lost souls. The real world of Grzegorz has been full of work, life, more work, and dozing off in front of the TV lately. But I joyfully found a moment to write for you today!

  • Zombies, those strange ghouls, are an inseparable part of popular culture, constantly evolving and transforming over the course of history. The distant roots of this motif lie in African and Haitian religious beliefs, where zombies were defined as living beings, intoxicated and susceptible to the control of a priest who put them in a trance.

  • If you’re a believer, Christmas Eve and Christmas in self are the most beautiful time of the year. It’s the moment when you can legally eat 12 dishes and feel absolutely no guilt. Family gatherings, celebrating together, sharing presents and joy — it all sounds like a recipe for holiday success. But everyone has their…

  • Hi, dear friends! How are your pre-Christmas moods? This week, I have so much work that I don’t even know if I’ll manage to do everything I want. I can’t even find time for the blog. And you know why? Because the holidays are approaching, and people are going completely crazy. They buy, spend, consume,…

  • Hello everyone! This weekend, I finally did something I’d been putting off for a long time — I cleaned out the special room that my wife calls the shed, where we keep the rubbish bins. But I know better — it’s not just an ordinary shed, it’s a zombie apocalypse bunker! Yes, I know what…

  • In my head!

    Silence. Peace. Everything packed? The last few hours before a trip are that magical time when calm and harmony lose the battle to chaos and madness. You think you’re ready – but then you suddenly remember you still need to find ten things you last saw two years ago.

  • Me, Grzegorz – almost a gardener – received a mysterious package today from my friend in the northern reaches of the UK. Just the fact of getting a parcel from such an exotic place, where men wear skirts (sic!), filled me with a mix of curiosity and joy. What could be inside?

  • Parenthood!

    Ah, parenthood! That beautiful journey where silence doesn’t mean a moment of peace — it’s the calm before the apocalypse. Why is it so quiet? I’d ask myself, heart pounding like a drum. This wasn’t ordinary silence. This was the silence. The kind that whispered — run while you still can. The longest 30 seconds of my life? Walking from…

  • Remember those simpler times when we were just casually living our weird little lives? One day you’re debating whether to buy the fancy ketchup, the next – bam! You’re in a global pandemic thriller where toilet paper becomes currency and social distancing is a thing.